#not malicious just genuine confusion

[spaciebabie]

honestly bro I think the funniest thing Abt being autistic is that I can't tell when people are trying ta be friends with me it just like doesn't click. ppl will all of the sudden start talking ta me and I'll be like, "hm why is this person talking ta me so much all of the sudden do they want something I mean I guess I'll go along with it"

[anistarrose]

My current version, of my ever-evolving theory, on what constitutes "aromantic stories" is that first off, there's absolutely a wide spectrum between 1, "this is explicitly undeniably about aromanticism," and 2, "there sure is a noteworthy amount of aro subtext, but representing aros clearly wasn't the author's intent." But the spectrum is best completed not as a straight line, but as a triangle, where the 3rd point is "the story probably wasn't created with aromanticism at the forefront of anyone's mind, but was created with subverting particular expectations related to romantic relationships in mind." And in my experience, a lot of juicy aromanticism-related experiences that are underrepresented in their own right can lie in that third option, regardless of whether the characters are aro-spec or allo or kind of whatever you headcanon.

So, what does make a story on this spectrum "aromantic?" IDK, I wouldn't necessarily include all or most of the firm 2s (unintentional subtext) under the aromantic story mantle. But when you get into the gray areas that inch a little closer to 1 and 3, let alone the gray area between 1 and 3 where intent is ambiguous but ultimately may not matter, it makes sense that different people will have different takes.

[vermilionite]

honestly why don’t we as a culture have much more of an understanding of healthy fear and self protection/advocacy about doctors and medical care, people bristle at the idea that you wouldn’t trust a doctor fully, but there are many many cases of medical malpractice, doctors with big egos, dismissive doctors, or even just miscommunication and misunderstanding that can cost people a lot of money, their health, or their lives. like it seems so obvious when i lay it out but people, both who work for the hospital/insurance, and everyone else, really do not like when you act with trepidation and uncertainty around getting your body literally cut open and given many drugs. it is so frustrating and confusing

[bookwyrminspiration]

im getting she/girled (non-maliciously) and is it a big deal? no. but man am i Aware of it

[afterartist]

Nothing funnier than me talking about how I used to get bullied for having freckles and just having someone reply “yeah I wasn’t bullied for my freckles so you probably did something else to deserve it”

Like damn okay lmao, r u jealous I was bullied for my ADHD swag and stunning good looks while you weren’t?? That was almost a decade ago I literally couldn’t care about it anymore lmao

[fetishflags]

sorry about coming off a little rude. if you want a similiar template kie just used fontmeme's image wave effect tool to make the flags wavy. again, its not too difficult, I did not mean to come off as rude.

kitty made own and quite proud it ! again not meant to confuse anyone or claim specific flag as mine just meant to give tips using things have done before ! ^^

[americiumam]

can anyone explain to me what the problem with “genderbending” is

[guiltycrunch]

wait, are you swedish or finnish?

you could have just called me a slur

[fagrevolt]

I genuinely don't get all the comments that are like "i have friends that are the reverse of this (AMAB identifying as transmasc) and it's totally fine! everyone's cool with it!!" like what is in the fucking water where you are then lmao. as a trans man I genuinely can't imagine me or any other trans men or transmascs I know being cool with what would literally just be a cis man roleplaying as a transmasc person for SO many reasons. I get genderfuckery, I get wanting to be accepting of everyones identities, I get that you'll never truly know how someone feels internally BUT. just like so many transfems on this post have already said, words have fucking meanings. Absolute clown shit to think you can just throw around these terms in the name of inclusion when all it does is alienate and endanger the ppl the terms are ACTUALLY for

AITA for warning new transfem friends that someone is actually AFAB?

i’ll keep this short but i have a friend kelly (22F) who identified as male for a couple years during the pandemic but has now de transitioned (no hormonal or surgical changes were ever made she just grew her hair out again) but she calls herself transfem since she technically was male then female

we have a group chat that frequently has members from university coming and going and kelly likes to send a lot of “relatable transfem memes” and bring it up a lot. sometimes we get new members who are actually transfem and they go to her for advice on a body that she does not have (and she often does not give great advice)

so whenever i add someone to the group chat who is transfem i just give them a heads up that kelly is AFAB and just calls herself transfem so they shouldn’t go to her for advice or relatability specifically over being transfem and stuff

kelly found out through screenshots and is pissed saying i don’t respect her identity. i don’t care what labels she wants to use i just don’t want actual trans people going to her for advice or thinking she’s someone they can talk to about issues concerning their bodies because by definition she is a cisgender woman who identifies with her birth gender. i’m trans AFAB too btw not that it really matters but i don’t wanna get flamed for not mentioning that

am i being transphobic or label phobic or whatever? i just don’t want new friends receiving potentially harmful advice or thinking they’ve found someone like them

What are these acronyms?

[rachedurst]

Ngl sometimes people on here leave me dumbfounded because some of you will say a sentence without specifying what you mean, using the most general terms possible, and then get mad and say people are taking you in bad faith when you did not clarify what exactly you were talking about in the first place

[the-joy-of-knowledge]

25 Laws of power for women

Conceal your goals especially the ones that are appealing. Losing weight, reinventing yourself, marrying wealthy. Instead talk about your altruistic goals - to help children, invest in education, this will chase insecure people with vile intentions.

Do not give anyone your source of power: Was is a book that changed your life? a mentor? a movie? Never give up your secret to success. If forced to do say allude to God, the universe, the a random phenomenon

Use the patriarchy to your favor; we live in a world that is, only associate with men who have power, use that power for good.

Never appear too perfect but be selectively vulnerable when needed. Only share something that you will be comfortable saying. You might say “I forget my keys all the time,” “I don’t know how to perfectly park a car “. But never disclose something you are not comfortable with just because you are afraid of being perfect.

Maintain distance in relationships. Friends are the best and you need them. But if you feel that they are becoming too dependent, see them at your own will. But also the reverse could be the case. Your friend may keep a distance, and that is the way of life. You have got to move on from it.

Develop your own style that makes you unique, beautiful, and elegant. Avoid trying to fit in the crowd of people who claim to care less about their style yet have too many opinions about other women’s style

Avoid male friends at all cost, you will have male colleagues, male bosses, male acquaintances, business partners. Keep it that way. You do not want a Truman Capote divulging your secrets to the world. Do not keep a man who does not fit your standard.

You do not have to win at every game. Pick and choose what is best for you and leave room for others. And step down if you have attained that level of success, do not let the society do it for you.

Trust people but remember that we are all humans. So trust with discretion!

Confuse people with kindness; people are not always comfortable with beautiful and intelligent women. That power is too intimidating so confuse them by being genuinely generous, curious, kind, and passionate.

Keep your strong opinions to yourself.. if you support a movement, a way of life, do so silently.

We all have dirty laundry, wash them privately, don’t expose yourself. Remain silent when people try to attack you or shame you. Whatever is not confirmed is not true. You are the only one who knows all the truth about you.

Don’t attract pity or praise: People who pity you do not help you, in fact they might think that you are weak and could mock you at their annual gossipping meeting. And if you are doing things for the sake of praise you are wasting your time.

Choose yourself all the time; never put any one’s feelings above yours.

Trust your own intuition if you feel someone is being malicious towards you, giving you back handed compliments then you should let them go

Never speak bad of another woman. Do not lazy around gossipping. Keep your hands clean and your conscience clear.

Avoid women with low self esteem they will bring you down. For some reason they do not like seeing other women who are doing better than them

Be careful who you seek validation from. Not everyone needs to be pleased. If they are in no way capable of contributing to your life in the ways you prefer, then don’t ask them for their opinions or please them.

Do not compete with other women, if you do you are only putting them on a pedestal. You are making the the standard by which you measure your progress. If you do compete, begin digging your grave.

Do not give unsolicited advice, do not share the inner workings of your mind, If your mouth is very charitable you better start journaling.

Be well-rounded and interesting. It attracts people. It also keeps you busy because you are continually improving and learning. An idle mind is an easily subdued one.

Avoid women who want to live vicariously through you; they want to know who you know, shop where you shop, befriend who you befriend, wear what you wear.

Pay attention to the source of your discomfort; get rid of them. You tell them your dreams and they remind you of all your hindrances. They ask why are you dressed so fancy as though fancy isn’t subjective. They undermine you interests and goals. They will also be quick to bring you down because they are afraid of your potential.

Do not fear power or please power. When we see powerful people we try to hard to befriend them, to be close to them but you need to be comfortable without them. Don’t push yourself in the name of friendship, do not try too hard to be in their inner circle. Your independence of mind is the most important. Instead become a powerful woman, aloof to the presence of power but aware of its importance. Be an ingenious and intelligent and use your creativity to uplift yourself. When you do so it will be hard to ignore you. Even the powerful will become an ally.

Enjoy moments of solitude. Use that time to develop yourself, improve your body, learn new skills, create with your mind, read widely, become more elegant, then launch yourself.

Remember the most powerful women are the most intelligent. Inspired by Robert Greene's 48 Laws of Power. Use at your discretion.

[alastorss]

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

Alastor's antlers are embarrassingly, pathetically, unbearably sensitive.

He can't for the life of him figure out why—it's not like any of the other transfigured creatures wandering around the underworld were made this way. Most other animal-like sinners don't seem to care about or even acknowledge their characteristics.

Yet here he is, purposefully hiding them away just so that no one will discover his terrible weakness. Oh, what he would give to be like the others if only to ignore their incessantly uncomfortable presence on his head.

Perhaps it was a curse from heaven that made him this way, or karma that he was repaying from his life. Either way, he can't stand being touched.

At least, that's what he thought.

There's no malicious intent behind your hands, no glint in your eye that makes the primal instincts in his head scream at him to melt into the shadows. You're as gentle as can be, fingers running delicately along the intricacies of his antlers and stopping just at the ends of them.

"They're beautiful," you whisper with your eyes blown wide. Your shoulders rise and fall with each rapid breath, probably from the adrenaline of standing so close to an Overlord like this. And Alastor, no less.

Your reliable hotelier. Your first real friend in the hotel. The one whose smile cannot be trusted.

But for some reason, you can't shake the feeling that he's looking at you with pure, genuine appreciation even if his smile is a little wonky.

"Why, thank you, darling!"

He jerks away from you quick as the wind, standing tall once again and towering over you. His expression has morphed into something more strained—you can tell by the way his face creases up as his eyes narrow.

He was the one who decided to invade your personal space while the two of you were arguing. He just didn't think that you would be so bold as to get distracted by his antlers and have the gall to reach out to touch them.

The worst part? The absolute worst part of it all is that no one in all the time he's been in Hell has been gentle with him like that.

Add that to the list of things he despises. Or likes. You're confusing him now.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

You have some nerve, he thinks.

Your hands have found a new home resting atop his head, with your fingers combing through his hair and tracing up and down the curve of his antlers.

It becomes a nightly routine—him on the barstool or sitting in front of the piano and you standing behind him with your fingers tangled in his hair and your chin on his head, perched right between the horns. Others in the hotel have started to raise a brow, but you don't seem to care.

So when you finally decide to break routine, sitting on the opposite end of the couch from him, his eye twitches.

There isn't even an audience tonight, everyone else already tucked into bed save for Husk behind the bar who's too busy with a bottle to care. The silence between you is heavy as lead.

"Is something the matter?" Alastor finally abruptly asks, eyes narrowed at you from the side. You shift uncomfortably.

"Why would something be the matter?"

He's not in the mood for games right now. "This is the first time you've sat away from me in months," he observes.

You look at him, surprised by his hostility over this. "Well, Lucifer told me that you don't like—"

"Lucifer," he interrupts, head now whipping to the side so he can fully glare at you. "Knows nothing."

You blink at him, stunned. With the way he's acting, he almost seems... annoyed that you've decided to stop being so handsy?

Silence overcomes you again as you just stare at each other, completely at a loss of words. Alastor finally realizes his snappiness and composes himself once more, exhaling through his teeth.

His smile softens at you, missing its usual edge. You know him like this the best—head in your lap and antlers exposed. It's familiar to you in a way that it could never be to anyone else. At least, you hope that's true.

"He knows nothing," the radio demon says one more time for good measure, eyes drifting shut under the weight of your hands.

Alastor has never liked to be touched before. But maybe there is a first time for everything, and maybe the safety of your touch brings him enough ease that you're the first he admits he can tolerate.

His smile says it all. He's content like this, even if he would deny it with his chest if you ever told anyone else.

"Okay," you breathe. "I believe you."

[misunderstood-shadowling]

is it not bacteriophage in english as well tho?

I would like to introduce you to my languages name for our favorite bacteria eating virus

[dervampireprince]

Wild that someone I occasionally watch on YouTube got beamed to my Tumblr dashboard

uh well you didn't use a tone tag so i have no idea if this is an insult. but i've been using tumblr for over 10 years, this blog specifically for about 4 years and dervampireprince and all the audio content i make on youtube started here on tumblr first so... i mean i don't know if you were asking why i'm on tumblr... i don't understand what this ask means at all or why you sent it or if you're complaining that tumblr is recommending my posts to you or if you're just making a statement but if it's just a statement or observation i don't know why you'd message that to me like i needed to know so... i hope it's not annoying that i'm on your dashboard i guess. if you meant it just like woah cool didn't prince would be here on tumblr uh hi i guess you found me. /confused /nm

[foldingfittedsheets]

A friend I had briefly in my teens years was this girl in Arizona. She was a junior when I was a freshman, and as I was socially awkward and very lonely she kind’ve pulled me under her wing for a while. I don’t remember how we met, but I remember riding in her car and meeting her cute miniature Doberman.

But the thing I remember most about this girl was that she loved lying to me. And I had a massive but I acknowledged crush on her so I adored being lied to. Her natural charisma and storytelling was hypnotic.

It’s not what it sounds like because it wasn’t malicious but she came up with this in depth lore to tell me about this fake job she had. I know autistic people are meant to be credulous but I truly never believed her stories, I just adored her storytelling and was very ready to listen to whatever tale she spun that day. Another of her friends chided her once for teasing me but I genuinely never minded.

In her lore she moonlighted as a Professional Liar. People would hire her to get close to a target they wanted rattled. She’d make friends, develop a strong relationship, foster a dependency on her, then disappear. Then when they were confused and missing her sometime when the employer needed their target rattled she’d show back up as a glimpse to knock them off balance. Often it was implied she’d faked her death in the interim.

That itself was fine, it was an okay story. But in order to support that lie she’d make up tons of supporting details that were way more fun. She had this fake boyfriend who got high as balls on a mission and ended up seeing a sheep in a field and carrying it to a farmhouse to try to buy it because he wanted a puppy. I liked that one but suspected she didn’t know how big sheep were.

She’d IM chat with me as this made up boyfriend sometimes; once she had him ask me if I noticed her limping and he told me she’d just lost a toe but was covering for it like a champ. That one was fun.

She told me about something she called “purple charge” which was a way to get instant night vision. I did try looking that one up on the off chance, but was sadly disappointed there.

She said that Professional Liars had such high stakes jobs that they needed a week of insane time where they just partied so hard it was like a Dionysus rave and her IM boyfriend persona implied she’d killed someone during one of those stints.

I had such a fun time with her elaborate fiction that I’d often ask follow up questions and she had to do a lot of world building to keep up with my fascination. We’d get to class and I’d have three or four new questions which I think is why her friend thought her teasing was too far. They genuinely thought I believed her but I was just loving the fiction.

If any of this sounds malicious I’ll also add that when I got harassed on a roleplaying board she went out guns blazing to go after the guy who’d been harassing me. She genuinely enjoyed my company.

I find myself looking back on our friendship very fondly. I can’t remember her last name or have any way of looking her up, but she really was a professional liar to me. The only downside is that I’m completely faceblind so if she ever wanted to pop unexpectedly into my life I’d have no idea it was her.

[certifiedsexed]

why do you have to be so annoying about terminology

like when someone says “I’m a woman and (insert question concerning genitalia here),” why do you have to respond like “oh, im not sure what you mean. if you mean to say you have a vulva, (insert answer here)”

i understand not all women have vaginas and all that stuff and it’s cisnormative or whatever but why do you have to act purposefully obtuse about it? you know what they mean.

Well, I'm honestly not trying to be annoying, Anon.

I'm autistic and have studied to be a teacher for awhile, which both means I genuinely cannot tell if someone's being transphobic or just using the wrong word and that I'm not going to let bigotry slide, accidental or not.

An easy way to respond is simply by being clear that I'm not sure which is happening and explaining thoroughly for both possibilities (or sometimes, explaining thoroughly for one possibility and saying I need more information if they mean something else because sometimes I do!), which gives Anon any more specific, accurate language they might've been looking for.

Something some people don't realize about autism is that its largely a communication disability. I am not acting obtuse, though I understand how you jumped to that conclusion: I am genuinely unsure. I don't want to assume people's genitalia and I don't want to accuse people of transphobia/intersexism without knowing that's what's going on.

Maybe its easy for other people to tell but statements like that are confusing to me. Whenever I run into sentences that confuse me, I leave room for doubt and reply the best I can with the information I have. Its a social "script" I use, which eases my anxiety about possibly answering questions completely wrong and hopefully helps people understand I am not maliciously answering wrong if I do.

I'll be honest, unless you have a suggestion for a better way to reply, that's probably what I'm going to stick with. I understand its annoying but I'd rather be annoying than make assumptions and possibly fuck people over.

You're not the first person to tell me the way I talk is annoying and I imagine you won't be the last but I kind of have to work with what I've got, Anon.

If you have any questions or suggestions, though, let me know!